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You would have to be an idiot to think Luis Suarez is fat. August 27, 2011

Posted by Alex Tomchak Scott in English soccer.
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Yeah, a real piggy

Sports Illustrated’s Peter Berlin wrote this in a recent blog post. (emphasis mine)

Kenny Dalglish left his best payer, Luis Suarez, on the field for 20 more minutes. Perhaps Dalglish wanted Suarez to get the goal he deserved and continue his record of scoring in every game this season. Perhaps Dalglish was simply being stubborn, having been asked during the week whether he would rest Suarez. In any case, he allowed us more time to consider the surprising question: Is Suarez fat?

I’ll field this one, Peter. No.

No.

Luis Suarez is not fat. People who are fat do not look like this without their shirts on. For future reference, you can generally tell if someone is fat by checking to see  if there is body fat visible on his figure. Defined abdominal muscles are generally a good indicator that somebody is not fat.

What I mean to say is, you could have looked.

Furthermore, Peter Berlin, considering that you look like this, you may not be entitled to cast the first stone in a debate over people’s weight.

It should not be overlooked either that sending the message that an ultra-fit athlete who happens not to have had a break in a couple of years is overweight probably doesn’t do a heck of a lot of good for people who are also not overweight but insecure about their body images. It’s always kind of sickening when professional footballers (Frank Lampard and Wayne Rooney, for instance) are called fat.

Furthermore, when soccer players actually do manage to become fat, it’s usually for reasons that are actually really sad; for instance, Ronaldo’s thyroid problem.

Note that I did call Michael Johnson “chubby” earlier today. I was wrong. I apologize. I hope Peter Berlin does too.

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